Daddy Daughter Day

This work of adult fiction, loosely based on characters portrayed by Russell Crowe, includes adult language and experiences; you have been warned. No copyright infringement on the original work is intended. Copyright Reagan Kavanagh 2007.

MAXIMUS
Cassandra was away overnight and tomorrow at a conference in Houston; she is to return late tomorrow evening. She had flown to that city on this occasion and had taken a limousine from the airport to her hotel in the Reliant Sports Complex area of the city near the old Astrodome. This was the first occasion on which I had been totally alone with my daughter other than for a few hours. It was also the first time I had ever – in either life – been completely responsible for the well-being of an infant. My wife had left specifics for my use in the event of an emergency.

“Babies run temperatures as a matter of course if anything upsets their schedule, and my being away will likely do that. If she does spike a temperature, it's nothing to worry about unless it goes above 100.4degrees on rectal measurement. In that instance, get her to hospital immediately; call Dr. Harbin after you get Emily into the Trauma Centre. If her temperature is normal but she won't stop crying for more than an hour, or she seems listless, or unusually irritable, or you have trouble waking her, call the doctor. Ditto for seeing any rash or spots because that could signal a communicable disease such as measles, as she can't have her MMR vaccination until she's a year old. She's had everything scheduled for her age, so she should be fine. If you have questions, call Sooze and Sarah and get their opinion other than on the temperature bit or the other things I've mentioned.

“I've been expressing milk for the past four days, and it's in bottles in the refrigerator and freezer. Use the oldest bottles first; they're labelled with dates and times that I expressed the milk. Thaw the frozen bottles in the 'fridge for a couple of hours before warming them. All you need do is heat the bottle in warm, running water. I'd put the bottle in a clean ziploc bag and lay it in the sink and let the water run over it for a few minutes …putting the bottle in the baggie keeps it sterile whilst it's bobbing about in the sink. Put the nipple on the bottle – they're in the sterile jar beside the sink – and swirl the bottle to distribute the heat evenly, then test the temperature on the inside of your wrist. If it's warm but not uncomfortable to your touch, it's a good temperature and won't burn her mouth. Do NOT heat the bottles in the microwave. It destroys some of the immune properties, and it's also too easy to overheat it and burn her.”

We were sitting at the kitchen table when this conversation occurred, and I was attempting to take detailed notes. Cassandra had begun training Emily to a bottle some two weeks past in preparation for this trip. Our child had fretted at first, but within a few days she took to the bottle as easily as to her mother's breast. I confess I felt an unbounded joy on the first occasion I held my daughter in my arms and fed her. My lack of success in keeping up with my wife's rapid-fire speech patterns must have been obvious. She noted my look of concern and smiled as she reached across the table to touch my arm.

“Max, don't worry. You don't need to write down everything I say. I've typed up everything and put it in a file in Emily's folder on my computer desktop. The specific document is called Emily-Trip.” I smiled in relief. “Everything I could think of about her is in that file, even the list of emergency telephone numbers …oh, and Dr. Harbin's office and emergency numbers are also on the pad beside the phone on your desk.” She thinks of everything. I looked across the table at her, and she smiled before speaking.

“Are you going to be okay alone with her, Caro? Should I call Sarah and ask if she could spend the weekend with the two of you? You know she would …she offered last week.” I shook my head in the negative.

“We will be fine. It is time I accepted full responsibility for our child on those occasions you are unavailable. I am looking forward to caring for her. It will – as you have often said – give us an opportunity to bond beyond that level experienced by many fathers.”

“You'll both be fine, Max. If I didn't have absolute faith in your ability to care for Emily, I wouldn't be making this trip. If you need me, call. I'll have my cell phone on 24/7, and there's no seminar so important that it can't be interrupted for you or our child.” Her words warmed my heart.

EMILY
Mummy? Where's my Mummy? I can't smell her. Papa's here, but Mummy isn't, and I want her! Perhaps if I cry, she'll come.

That didn't work, but Papa's here and picking me up. I love my Papa. His face is scratchy, but it feels good when he holds me up to his cheek. He's getting ready to feed me because I smell milk. Milk used to come just from Mummy, but lately it's been coming from something else. I guess it's okay as long as they feed me.

SOOZE
“Hey, Max. How's it going without Reags there? You and Emily doing okay?” He laughed, and I heard Emily's baby gurgle. He must be holding her. The thought of a man so appallingly male holding and nurturing a tiny infant made me smile.

“We are well, Sooze, and I thank you for calling to check on us. Emily is taking her bottle well and urinating and defecating in the expected manner. She still sleeps much of the time, but Cassandra assures me that is normal.”

“Well, if Sarah or I can do anything, or if you have any questions, you know you can call at any time. We'll be home all weekend.”

“Thank you, and please give Sarah my regards.” I hung up the phone and turned to Sarah.

“He's so in love with that child. It's beautiful to see a man so adoring of his child when so many aren't.”

I'd asked the guys a long while back if I could clue Sarah in on their origins because there would be things along the way that would just be impossible to explain away if she didn't have that foundation. The four of us had literally spent a weekend afternoon walking through one of Dallas' city parks discussing it. I routinely swept the office for bugs – any group in our industry does – but we weren't taking any chance on someone having technology we weren't aware of and dropping a net over all of us. I'd made my request, and we'd set up a date to discuss it. The conversation had gone pretty much like this.

Terry	You and Sarah have been together for what, almost five years?
Sooze	Since shortly after she hired on as Dolores' nanny, so yes, about five years.
Max	Has she asked you questions about us?
Sooze	Several times, based on things she's heard in passing.
Dino	Does she know anything right now?
Sooze	Nothing she can actually nail down, but she's suspicious. The three of you don't want any secrets from Dee, Reags, and Ellie, and I don't want any from her. Secrets like this – even though they don't directly concern Sarah – will eventually drive us apart. She needs to know the truth.

They agreed Sarah should know, and the next item was to schedule a meeting for all of us – Dee, Reags, and Ellie included – to tell her the guys' reality. Dee and Terry invited all of us to dinner at The Hawthorne, I'd farmed Dolores out for the night, and we'd dropped the bomb. Sarah told me later that initially she'd thought we were all certifiable, but then she realized that it wasn't possible all seven of the people sitting around the table with her were loony. Over the years she has come to respect each of my partners and the women in their lives for their individual as well as collective strengths and intelligence. She also has an amazing facility for glossing over or just flat ignoring all our shortcomings.

“Sooze, I just don't understand how this can have happened.”

“Neither do I, Sarah, but I know it has. We've all explored the various theories that deal with the space-time continuum, and the possibility is there. The only real hitch is that while they can move forward in time – and obviously have – they can't go back. They're here, they're stuck here, and they're doing all they can to make the most of a unique situation.”

“Are all of Crowe's characters walking around somewhere?” I'd nodded as I shrugged.

“As far as we know, yes, and we're in regular contact with a few of them. You've already met several of them, but it didn't register for you at the time. Jeff Wigand and Jack Aubrey were at Max and Reags' wedding, as was East Driscoll. You danced with both Jack and Jeff. We keep tabs on most everyone else.” Her mouth fell open as her eyes moved up and to the left in recalled memory.

“Holy Mother of God ….” I grinned at her.

“Precisely.”

REAGAN
“Hey, there. I'm here and safely ensconced in my room. You and Emily surviving?”

My husband chuckled as he answered.

“We are doing quite well. I think she would prefer your breast to the bottle – as would I – but she has taken her meals with no difficulty. I have just put her down for her nap. Your flight was as expected?”

“Barring the usual turbulence that accompanies most final approaches into the Houston airports, it was fine. It's difficult to get into too much trouble in the 45 minutes between Love Field and Houston Hobby, and as I knew the turbulence was forthcoming, I had my tray table up and locked before the flight attendant made that announcement. The drive from Hobby to the hotel took almost as long as the flight from Dallas.”

I was staying the Marriott's Spring Hill Suites a couple of miles from Houston's Reliant Sports Park complex. That got me away from most of the conventioneers-cum-party-goers who always seem to throng to the hotels either on a given complex or just across the street from it. As a new mother who'd not yet totally weaned her child off the breast, I was looking forward to an uninterrupted night's sleep and didn't want to be disturbed by some drunken fool whooping it up in the hallway outside my room.

“Emily and I are faring quite well; you need not worry for us. If she should experience any difficulty, I will take her to hospital, call Dr. Harbin, and then call you. As for you, I encourage you to relax as best you can …perhaps you would enjoy a bit of shopping or a meal with an old friend whilst you are there.”

“Shopping. Right. The only times since you've known me that I've voluntarily gone shopping was to buy clothes for our wedding trip and then baby things for Emily.” He laughed.

“And my collective bank accounts appreciate your frugality.” I snorted at that one, and he laughed again as I spoke.

“Frugality has nothing to do with it, I just don't enjoy the process.” I checked my watch. “I need to run, Caro. Check-in at the convention starts in 15 minutes, and I need to get a cab to the sports complex and hoof it over to the arena. I'll call tonight before I go to bed, and remember that my cell is on in case you need me.”

“I shall always need you, Cara, but I shall attempt not to disturb you unnecessarily whilst you are there. My heart is yours and will be here with our child when you return.”

“I love you, Max. I'll be home tomorrow evening.” I rang off and sat thinking. Max and I'd gone through some difficult situations in our short time together …his abduction, my accident and miscarriage, his near affair with the woman in Dallas, but we'd come through it all. There's a saying I once read …where you find true friendship, you find true love. That pretty well summed up my feelings for my husband. I'd been smitten with him the night we met, but he'd become my true and forever, good times and bad, sorrow and ecstasy, friend. From his actions and his words, I think he feels the same about me. We'd managed to find true friendship and true love in this crazy world, and we were blessed. I smiled as I stood and picked up my briefcase before heading out of the room and downstairs.

MAXIMUS
I had faced the absence of my wife and taking on full care of our daughter with some trepidation. Whilst I believe I have been largely successful in integrating myself into this century, the vestiges of the Roman male of the second century still reside within me.

In that earlier time men did not undertake child care; that was the province of women and slaves. A Roman father had little interaction with his children until they approached their coming of age, the time at which a male child donned the toga of an adult and a female child surrendered her childhood bulla the night before her marriage. Roman men always interacted more with their sons at all stages of life than with daughters; it was a father's responsibility to instruct his son in how to become a good citizen and thus, a good Roman. In truth, Roman men scarcely knew their children in the sense one knows one's child in this time. We cared for our children's health and well being; they were our future, and our lineage was of supreme import. We did not know the import of emotional and psychological development, and it is unlikely we would have cared had we known.

Male children of a Roman citizen were raised to be good citizens, often soldiers and, if the child was of the Senatorial class, to enter public service. Females were raised to be wives and mothers. Roman fathers were often harsh with their sons (as I had been with Marcus) and largely dismissive of their daughters. That would not be the case with Emily or with any future children Cassandra and I might have. I had over time inculcated enough of the values of this century that I wished to nurture my children, not simply because they were our future, but because I love Emily and any siblings she might have as I love my wife. I would protect and defend them with my life, not because they represented the procession of my lineage into the future, but because they are all in the world that matter to me. I could lose my property, my money, and my position, but if my wife and children were safe and survived with me, my life would be complete. These thoughts meandered through my mind as I held Emily and rocked her prior to putting her in her cot to sleep that night.

The day had passed without event. My daughter had fussed a bit at taking the bottle in place of her mother's breast, but with patience and determination on my part, she had eventually settled in to her meals. I had burped her following each meal, changed her nappies when necessary, and bathed her prior to putting her down for the night. I had puttered about the house with small things, putting her in the baby sling Cassandra often used. I had not anticipated the paternal warmth I felt in having my child physically so close to my heart as I went about the routine matters of my day. I found myself carrying on a conversation with her – albeit it one-sided – regarding my activities even to asking her opinion on various things. Her response was either a smile, a reach with a small hand toward my face, or a sleepy yawn. I had not known a grown man could find such joy in the company of an infant. It had taken me 2000 years, but I had at last discovered the joy of being a father to my child.

TERRY
“How's it going, Mate? You and Ems making it okay without mummy there?”

Max's chuckle before answering said everything was apples.

“We are well. She is taking her bottle without too much fuss and sleeps much of the time between feedings.”

“Nappy changes not a problem?”

“Terry, an infant can only produce so much bodily waste. Thus far I have been equal to the task.” That said Emily'd not had any bouts of diarrhoea in Reags' absence, a good thing as I recalled one of the few times I'd been left alone to tend Henry I ended up taking him to hospital for that very problem. The doctor explained – very patiently – that most infants have watery stools early on, and it wasn't life threatening but entirely normal. I'd felt the fool, and when Marjorie returned home, I'd let her have the rough side of my tongue for not enlightening me. Her response of 'I'd assumed you knew that' had done little to assuage my anger or embarrassment. Reags was apparently better at communicating with Max about infant care than Marjorie had been with me. What a surprise.

“You have plans for dinner tonight? Diana and I thought we might drive down with a pan of her lasagne and a salad …unless you have something else in the pipeline.”

“Tell Diana I have no plans that would not be willingly be cancelled were she so kind as to see to my nutritional needs this night. Cassandra left prepared meals in the refrigerator, but I will not refuse your offer.”

“We'll be there about five …we'd enjoy spending a bit of time with Ems before you put her down for the night.”

“I shall see you then, and I thank you.” I grinned at Diana as I put the receiver on its base.

“Reags left food prepared for him, but I suspect he's wanting a bit of adult company. He also likes your lasagne.”

“Don't let me forget to take the Parmesan wedge.”

REAGAN
The phone rang four times then rolled over to the machine. Where in Hell were Max and Emily? I tried his cell and got his voice mail. Now I was worried. I called the trauma centre at the small hospital in Ennis; no admissions of an infant and no one by the name of Espan had walked through the doors. Next was the Baylor Medical Centre at Waxahachie; same answer. That exhausted the possibilities for Ellis County, so I called “big Baylor” in Dallas. Emily was born there, and they had a chart on her. If she was ill and Max had taken her there, they'd have a computer entry by now. Nothing.

Terry! Call him. No answer at The Hawthorne, so I tried his cell. He answered on the second ring.

“Terry, it's Reags. I've been trying to call Max, and he's not answering the house line or his cell. I've tried the trauma centres at the local hospitals and Baylor in Dallas, and he's not at any of them. Do you know where he is? Can you see if Emily's alright?” The bastard laughed.

“Settle down, Luv, Max is right here, and Ems is in his arms. Diana and I drove down with dinner for him. At present we're in the front yard showing Ems the stars. I don't think she's particularly interested, but the rest of us are enjoying the sight.”

“Jesus, Terry, I was frightened half out of my mind!”

“They're both fine …let me give the phone to Max.” I heard him telling Max that I was in a panic, and all three of them had the temerity to laugh. My husband's voice was warm when he answered.

“Cara, Emily and I are fine. Terry and Diana were kind enough to bring dinner with them when they drove here this evening. They were of the opinion that I might wish for adult companionship and elected themselves my saviours. I am sorry you were worried.”

“I think I'm having a 'mummy moment.' I didn't think rationally, just panicked when I couldn't reach you. I'm sorry, Max.”

“There is no need for apology. I suspect I should have done the same were our positions reversed. We are yet new to this parenting business. In time we shall acquire more discernment where our daughter is concerned.”

“For both our sakes, I hope so.”

“I am about to put her into her cot for the night. Do you wish to tell her goodnight?” I laughed.

“I think you know the answer to that one.” I heard him talking softly to Emily and telling her that her mummy wanted to tell her goodnight.

“Emily? It's mummy. I love you, Angel, and you sleep tight. I'll see you tomorrow.” Max's voice came back on the phone.

“She was almost asleep but turned toward the receiver when she heard your voice. She recognises it. Ah …her thumb has gone to her mouth now. She will be asleep in moments.”

“I'm sorry I went into a flat spin, Max. It's just that it isn't easy being away from her when she's so small. You know my concern isn't a reflection on your ability to care for her or my confidence that you can do it alone …I just miss her!” To my shock and horror that last phrase came out as a sob. I'd had no idea how much I was going to miss my child until that moment. Max's voice was low and comforting.

“I cannot imagine how you must miss her at this moment, though I know at some point I will learn for myself. I will protect her with my life, Cara, as I will you. Sleep now, and we will be waiting for you tomorrow.”

“I love you, Max.”

“As I love you, Cara.”

DIANA
Terry and I had stayed in the lounge when Max went down the hall to put Emily to bed. He still had Terry's phone and was talking to Reags, obviously trying to calm her down. Terry had told me she was in a panic as soon as Max was out of earshot. Max walked back into the room a few minutes later and handed Terry his phone.

“She feared the worst when she could not immediately reach me. I suspect I should have done the same. She is calm now and going to bed.” I shook my head as I spoke.

“It still amazes me that cool, calm, collected Reags has turned into a mommy just like everyone else. You don't think she's going to be one of those cloying, overly protective mothers, do you?”

“I have no notion of how her behaviour will evolve over time with respect to our daughter. I do know she is fiercely protective of me, at times almost to a fault.” Gee, ya think?

“Perfectly normal, Max. Marjorie went from being a free spirit to a she-wolf within half-an-hour after Henry was born …or so her mum told me. Wouldn't even let the nurses change his nappies. She thought they wouldn't do it properly.”

I've never truly regretted the fact that I can't have children because the only way to deal with that loss was to accept it as a reality and move on. There's just no point wishing for something that's never going to happen. The accident happened before I'd decided on a life path; motherhood never was included in who I wanted to be as an adult. I've often said that I don't do young of any species, but that's probably more self-protection that anything else. I like children – I'm not quite sure what to do with them all the time – but I like them generically, and I absolutely adore Emily. I also love foals and puppies and kittens …and calves and baby sheep. Oh, hell. Why don't I just admit that I like babies and children but have limited exposure with them? There. It's done.

Max and Reags had asked Terry and me to be Emily's godparents before she was born, and we'd said yes. The four of us fall into the same category; we're far more spiritual than religious and don't think showing up front-and-center in church every Sunday makes you a good Christian. Terry and I did a lot of soul searching after agreeing to be Emily's godparents because that isn't a responsibility you take lightly; we probably should have looked at it before. If anything should happen to Max and Reags before Emily's grown, we'd bear the affirmative responsibility of raising her as a practicing Christian as her parents would have done.

Reags hasn't returned to the Catholicism of her childhood, but she's going to have to make some sort of concession to organized religion if Emily's going to be baptized, and I know that's in the cards. She hasn't said anything yet about timing on baptism and the formality of the godparents thing, but I know it's coming. If something should happen to Max and Reags and Terry and I had to raise Emily, which church would we take her to?

I was raised Baptist but don't have any particularly strong ties to that faith; I couldn't see myself voluntarily crossing the threshold of a Baptist church. Terry was raised Church of England, and I've no idea as to his feelings on that. I guess we could join the Methodist Church and raise her in that faith. It seems to be a nice, middle of the road Protestant denomination. God, what if Reags goes back to the Catholic Church? Would Terry and I have to convert, or could we just send Emily to parochial school and make sure she goes to mass every week? What about confession? I have no idea how all that works. Please, God, if you're listening, don't ever put Terry and me in a position to have to get definitive answers on all this!

EMILY
Papa's holding me again, and I like it. He smells different than Mummy, but I like his smell. Mummy's not here, and I don't know where she is. Did she go away and leave me and Papa alone?

Papa's singing to me now and rocking me, and I'm getting sleepy. He changed my nappy a few minutes ago, and I'm nice and dry and clean. We had fun when he gave me my bath tonight. He put his face in the water and blew bubbles at me, and I laughed. That seemed to make him happy, but I think he cried, too. I wonder why he did that. He picked me up in my towel and held me really close and walked round the room talking to me before he dried me off and got me into my nightgown. I love my Papa.

Mummy's home! She came back to us! Where's she been? Was she mad at us? I wish I could talk like big people do; Mummy just told me she wishes I could talk now so I could tell her about what Papa and I did whilst she was gone. Will I remember when I can talk what Papa and I did when she was away and tell her then?

Papa was holding me when Mummy walked into the room, and I almost got squished between them when they hugged each other. I guess she wasn't mad at Papa and me, or she wouldn't be so happy to see us. She's taking me from Papa and holding me close now and telling me she missed me.

I'm glad my Mummy's home. I love my Mummy and Papa.

NOTES

MMR Vaccination

Measles, Mumps, Rubella

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