REAGAN
“You ask me to convert to a faith that ignores the
righteousness of a person simply because they have not declared an affiliation
with that faith? Have you taken leave of your senses?”
I don't think I'd ever heard my husband's voice as cold as it was in asking those two questions after I'd told him that because of my wish to raise Emily as a Catholic, we'd not be able to have Dee and Terry stand as her godparents. How can you explain 2000 years of liturgy and canon law to someone who's only just now understanding the concept of Christianity? I rose and walked the length of the room in an attempt to collect my thoughts.
“Max, I don't know how to explain that to you. What I do know is that the Roman Catholic faith – and notice that I said ROMAN Catholic – was the first Christian faith and it still has the largest following of any Christian denomination. The Church has withstood the assault of the ages, and it's still here. I'll admit that in some ways we're antiquated, but we still believe in our way of worshipping God.” I don't want to think about the look he gave me before speaking.
“I will not be the one to tell our dearest friends they are not allowed to serve as our child's godparents because of some absurd and outdated canon of your faith.” I think any hope I had for my husband's conversion to Catholicism is circling the drain …and now he'd likely refuse to raise her as a Catholic, and she'd not even be baptised in my faith because of her father's refusal. I took a deep breath even as I cursed myself for having brought this to his attention. I should have searched until I found a way, whatever it might be. There fucking had to be a way.
“You said a few minutes ago that there must be a way. I shouldn't have brought it to your attention until I'd found that way. I'll keep looking. Please, Max, don't write off an entire denomination because of one idiosyncrasy. Give me – and my Church – a chance.” He gave me a penetrating look, his blue-green eyes boring into my soul before he finally spoke.
“Very well. I will do as you ask and give you the time you seek, but understand one thing. Terry and Diana will serve as our daughter's godparents …with your Church or without it.”
*
I was on the internet as soon as Max walked out the door the following morning; 'godparents' and 'denomination' were my search terms. I'd gone to probably 20 sites and found nothing to help when I clicked on one that made me smile. Five minutes later I was dialling the telephone.
*
“Corlyss Abernathy.”
“Reverend Abernathy, this is Reagan Espan-Kavanagh. You married my husband Max and me a couple of years ago.” I could hear the smile in her voice.
“I remember you …I have very good reason for never forgetting the two of you!” That may have been the understatement of her career. She and Ted Ackerman were the only persons outside the 'inner circle' of TEO's principals and their partners who knew of the men's collective origins and the admittedly unbelievable situation that Max and I shared.
“I have a problem; I was wondering when you might have an opening in your calendar so I can come and visit with you.”
“How about tomorrow at ten?”
“That would be wonderful. I'll see you then.”
*
I buckled Emily into her car seat at 0830, got in, and
fastened my safety harness before starting the ignition and backing up the
drive. I was on the Interstate and
heading for
I glanced in my rear view mirror every few minutes to be sure Emily was alright; she was asleep with baby drool on her lips. I smiled as I drove. I pulled into the car park outside the Perkins Chapel complex at SMU at a quarter of ten, got Emily out of the car, and walked to Corlyss Abernathy's office. I smiled at her secretary.
“Good morning. I'm Reagan Espan-Kavanagh. I have an appointment with Reverend Abernathy at ten.”
“Let me tell her you're here.” She buzzed the intercom, and the Methodist minister who had married Max and me opened the door to her office.
“Reagan! You have a baby now. Girl or boy, and what's the name?”
“Emily Mercedes Fiona Espan. She was born the 18th of December.”
“She's beautiful! May I hold her? I do have a little practice in holding babies.” I handed my child into capable hands as I spoke.
“Emily's the reason I'm here. Max and I have a problem, Reverend Abernathy.”
“Call me Corlyss. Would you like coffee or perhaps iced tea or a soda?”
“Tea would be wonderful; no sugar.” She stuck her head round the corner to the secretary's office, but the young woman was already on her feet.
“Got it, Corlyss. You want the same?”
“Please, Linda, and thank you.”
*
“Now, what's the problem. Please tell me you and your husband aren't having marital difficulties.”
“We are, and we aren't. The marriage is healthy, but we have a problem with baptising Emily.”
“How so? Doesn't your husband want her baptised?”
“He does, and that's the issue. You know I was raised Catholic but hadn't practised that faith in many years.” She nodded.
“Since Emily's birth, I've returned to Catholicism, and Max has considered conversion. Well, actually, he's considering adopting Christianity with the possibility of becoming Catholic; you know our history.”
“Unusual to say the least. Go on.”
“The problem is that we want our closest friends to stand as Emily's god parents when we baptise her, but they aren't Catholic. Because of that, they can't stand as her godparents in the Catholic Church ….” I let that sentence trail off, wondering if she'd take the lead. She'd been looking down at Emily who was still in her arms, but now she raised her head to look at me, her eyes narrowing. Linda tapped on the door and opened it, tea glasses in her hand. She handed one to me and put one on a coaster on Corlyss' desk, we thanked her, and she left. Corlyss looked back at me.
“Yes, I'm aware of that restriction.” She shifted Emily to her shoulder. “Unless I've lost my powers of perception,
you're going to ask me to baptise your daughter in the
“Dead on, but I'd appreciate your allowing me to explain why I'm asking this of you.”
Emily decided she'd been tolerant of this strange person long enough and started to fuss; I stood and leant over the desk, taking her from Corlyss' arms, and sat again.
“Aside from the obvious fact that you're trying to pull off an end run on the faith of your childhood, what can you offer to persuade me to do this? I have to be honest and tell you at this point I feel that both I and the Church I represent are being used.”
“In one sense, you are. In another, you'd be doing your part to bring another soul to our Lord.”
“I'm listening.”
“Max and I asked Terry and Dee – they served as our best man and honour attendant – to be Emily's godparents before she was born. I'd not even entertained the notion of returning to Catholicism at the time we married. They accepted, and Max and I were delighted. Both Dee and Terry have a very strong belief in God. She was raised in the Baptist faith, and Terry is Church of England. Max and I can't imagine any two people who would provide our child with more spiritual support and guidance than they would. If something happened to us and they raised her – and that eventuality is provided for in our wills – they would keep her in the Catholic Church, and I suspect in time, they might convert themselves.
“Following Emily's birth, my conscience began weighing me down, and I've begun attending mass again. I've made my confession each week, and Max is reading the Catechism and was of a mind to convert until I told him we'd not be able to have Terry and Dee stand as Emily's godparents if she was baptised in the Catholic Church. That little tidbit has set him off like a match in a powder keg. You don't want to know his comments on Christianity in general on realising that denomination would preclude two good people from being his daughter's godparents.”
“I gather it was less than complimentary.”
“You aren't even close. Reverend Abernathy, you knew when you married
us that I had been raised Catholic. You knew Max was – is – what Christians
consider a pagan. You seemed to believe that
if marrying us in your Church would bring us closer to God – and possibly into
practising Christianity in any form – that it was worth your time and the
investment of the sacrament of the
She leant forward and put her elbows on her desk, clasping her hands in front of her face and leaning against them. She watched me closely for several seconds before speaking.
“This couple is really that important to you? You truly feel that there isn't a practicing Catholic couple with whom you could be equally content?”
“No, there isn't. The only possibility would be Dean and Ellen O'Reilly – they were also at our wedding, and Dean is one of my husband's business partners – but they've only recently married. They aren't solid enough in their relationship to ask this of them, and Max and I aren't as close to them as we are to Dee and Terry.”
“How long have Dee and Terry been married?” I had anticipated her asking that and had an answer that wouldn't be an outright lie. I only hoped she wouldn't ask a follow-up question on that subject.
“They've been together almost as long as Max and me …nearly three years, and it's a solid a union as I've ever seen.” She sat back in her chair, and I held my breath.
“Reagan, I'm going to have to think about this and pray
on it. I realize you could have simply
asked me to baptise your daughter and let it go at that; in that instance I'd
have said yes without a second thought and been honored to do this for you and
Max, for Emily. You didn't do that; you
told me why you were asking, and I know it was uncomfortable for you. I appreciate your candor, and it's a very
strong point in your favor. Still,
because of that knowledge, I do have to give your request a good deal of
consideration. I don't want to be in the
position of prostituting my own faith, and I won't do that to the
I stood and shifted Emily to my left shoulder before extending my hand to Corlyss.
“That's perfectly acceptable, and I appreciate the fact
that you're willing to consider something so unorthodox. Thank you for seeing me.”
“Unorthodox? Well, yes,
that is one way of phrasing it!” Now
all I could do was wait.
MAXIMUS
“You have done what?”
I spent the next half hour giving my husband as near to a word-for-word replay of my conversation with Corlyss Abernathy as was possible.
“She would be willing to do this for Emily, for us?”
“She hasn't said yet she'd do it. She said she'd consider it. The fact that she didn't say 'no' and toss me out of her office makes me optimistic.”
He was silent for a moment, and I knew what was coming.
“Tell me – precisely – how this is going to assist you in having Emily baptised in the Catholic faith with regard to Terry and Diana as her godparents.”
“They will already be her godparents when she's baptised a Catholic. The priest will ask if there is anyone to be confirmed as her godparents, and we'll say no. The liturgy doesn't allow for any question on the subject beyond that. Terry and Dee will be her godparents, and that's what we're after, isn't it?”
“And what of you? What of your confession to your priest each week? Must you not tell him of this deception?”
I took a deep breath, and yes, I'd thought about that …quite a bit as a matter of fact.
“I'll make that confession directly to God and ask His forgiveness for the sin of omission in not confessing it to my priest. I think He's in a better position to judge the worthiness of the people we ask to be Emily’s godparents than any specific denominational representative.”
My husband shook his head as a slow smile appeared on his
lips and in his eyes.
“For all her wiles and expertise, I believe even Lucilla could
have learnt lessons from you in political intrigue.”
CORLYSS ABERNATHY
I'd been asked a lot of questions in my life and requested to
bend the so-called rules on more than one occasion. Reagan Espan-Kavanagh's request earlier in
the week had topped the list for unusual and unconventional. Baptize an infant in the
I'd called my bishop and met with him this morning. After he got over the shock of what I proposed, he gave me a very simple answer.
“Corlyss, the mission of our Church – of any denomination
– is to bring people to God. Would I
prefer that this family stay in the
“Our mission is saving souls. We know we can't save them all, and of those
we do, we can't know they'll all worship with us from that point forward.” I started to speak, but he raised his hand to
stop me.
“You're going to ask if I would do it.” I nodded.
“Yes, Corlyss, I would.” I called the Espan house on Saturday. Max answered the phone.
“Mr. Espan?”
“Yes.”
“This is Corlyss Abernathy. I met with your wife earlier in the week. Is she available?”
“Not at present. She has gone into town to do her weekly marketing. Did you wish to leave a message?”
“I've given a great deal of thought and prayer to the
request she made of me; I've also consulted my bishop on the matter. We prayed about it, and I've come to a
decision. I will baptize your daughter
in the
He was silent for a long time, and when he spoke, his voice was thick with emotion.
“I thank you, Reverend Abernathy, with all my heart. We will call you and arrange a date and time.”
I smiled as I put the phone back on its base. I might never get them into the
MAXIMUS
I had taken the book of catechism from where I had placed it on the bookcase following the discussion with my wife some time past. She returned from her marketing to find me again reading it.
“I thought you were done with Catholicism.”
“I have reason to reconsider it.” She walked through to the kitchen as I followed, and she placed her parcels on the counter before turning to me.
“Tell me why.”
“Reverend Abernathy called whilst you were out. She has agreed to baptise Emily so that Terry and Diana may stand as her godparents. I know it will remain your intention to raise our child in your faith, and I have no objection to that so long as our friends may serve as her spiritual guides should it be required of them. I do not say at this time that I will convert to your faith, but I will not object to it, and I will agree to raise Emily as Catholic. We are to call the Reverend and arrange a time for the ceremony.”
I held her close when she walked into my arms and wept in apparent relief.
*
We arranged a date two weeks hence for Emily's baptism, and I called Terry and Diana to insure their attendance. Without them present, we would have to reschedule.
“Thorne here.”
“Terry, it is Max.”
“What's up, Mate?”
“Are you and Diana free at half past noon on Sunday a week hence?”
“I think so …let me check the calendar. Yeah, we're free. What do you have in mind?”
“We have scheduled that date for Emily's baptism and wish you and Diana to be there in order to confirm you as her godparents. It will be at Perkins Chapel, where Cassandra and I married.”
“We'll be there, Mate, with bells on!”
*
Cassandra and I stood in front of Reverend Abernathy; my wife held our daughter. Terry and Diana were beside us, and our close friends were seated in the front row of the Church in which we were married. The reverend looked at us as she spoke.
“Brothers
and sisters in Christ: Through the Sacrament of Baptism we are initiated into
Christ's holy Church. We are incorporated into God's mighty acts of salvation
and given new birth through water and the Spirit. All this is God's gift,
offered to us without price.
“Will you
nurture this child in
Christ's holy Church, that by your teaching and example she may be guided to
accept God's grace for herself, to profess her faith openly, and to lead a
Christian life?”
We nodded, speaking firmly in reply.
“We will.”
“Are there those who would serve
as godparents to this child?”
Terry and Diana stepped forward.
“What are your names?”
Terry spoke for both of them.
“Terrence Thorne and Diana
Walker.”
“Terrence and Diana, will you
nurture this child in Christ's
holy Church, that by your teaching and example she may be guided to accept
God's grace for herself, to profess her faith openly, and to lead a Christian
life?”
They answered as one.
“We will.”
Reverend Abernathy now addressed the assembly of our friends, and they
answered.
“Do you,
as Christ's body, the Church, reaffirm both your rejection of sin and your commitment
to Christ?
“We do.”
“Will you
nurture one another in the Christian faith and life and include this child now before
you in your care?”
They read their responses from the prayer books in the
pews.
“With God's help we will
proclaim the good news and live according to the example of Christ. We will
surround this child with a community of
love and forgiveness that she may grow in her service to others. We will pray for her that she may be a true
disciple who walks in the way that leads to life.”
The Reverend put aside her book of prayer and held out
her arms to take Emily, looking at us as she did.
“What
name is given this child?”
I spoke her full name.
“Emily
Mercedes Fiona Espan. She is called Emily.”
“Emily, I baptize you in the name of the Father, and of the Son,
and of the Holy Spirit. Let us pray.
“O God,
our heavenly Father, grant that Emily, as she grows in years, may also grow in grace and in the knowledge of
the Lord Jesus Christ, and that by the restraining and renewing influence of
the Holy Spirit she may ever
be a true child of Yours, serving You faithfully all her days. So guide and uphold the parents of this child that, by
loving care, wise counsel, and holy example, they may lead her into that life of faith whose strength
is righteousness and whose fruit is everlasting joy and peace; through Jesus
Christ our Lord. Amen.”
Emily had fussed when the pastor sprinkled holy water on her small head
and anointed her forehead with holy oil. She calmed when she was placed in my arms. The rite was complete. My wife had succeeded not only in having our
child baptised with true godparents, but in insuring I would continue my own
journey toward accepting Christianity.
*
Our friends followed us to our home for the small celebration we had
planned in honour of this occasion. Reverend
Abernathy declined our invitation; she had a wedding to perform at three and
would not have sufficient time make the drive. We were standing in the lounge when Diana
asked the question.
“Reags, it didn't occur to me until just now, but why did you have Emily
baptized in the
I raised my brows as I looked at my wife wondering what her response
would be. We had decided not to tell
Terry and Diana of the difficulty with the Catholic Church unless they asked.
“We wanted you and Terry to be her godparents; that decision was made
before she was born.” Diana nodded.
“The Catholic Church doesn't allow non-Catholics to stand as godparents
because the intent of godparents is to shepherd the child in the Catholic faith.
Only practising Catholics can do
that. Fortunately, we found a way round
it. We'll still have her baptised in the
Catholic Church, and you won't be asked to stand for her as you've already done
it.”
Terry had been listening to the exchange and now shook his head.
“You're a crafty one, Reags.”
Little does he know.